It's all hidden.

i have been putting on a brave front, walking through it as if everything is fine
but tonight, i feel like i am all alone
there is nothing that can replace this emptiness i feel within me
and i guess i have to live through it slowly and painfully

-jaws

lightning bolt told you a secret at 10:57 AM .

Outings with my old classmates and friends!!

As promised from my last entry, i have some photos to upload from my outings with friends during the last few days of 2006.
on 27th i think, i went to meet ong lai! my favourite girlfriend who is always on for watching movies. i always catch a movie with her when we meet up, so in a way, she is my best movie kaki. haha. we went to shop in vivo but i dont recall buying many things as i had jus came back from bangkok and had definitely bought many things there. vivo is nice for shopping if you dont go there too often. going there once in a mth is always kinda refreshing. maybe its the boutiques, maybe its the whole ambience of vivo. so far, i havent gotten sick nor tired of vivo yet, despite increasing complaints from my friends that vivo is boring. haha. we went to watch the holidays, a movie i had initially wanted to watch with wk but he didnt want to. forget it man. i was so glad that ong lai wanted to watch that as well, so i had a date with her!! it was quite a good movie. i wont say its exactly memorable, cus its something u watch and u forget about it in a few mths time. well, there was cameron diaz and jude law which made me very happy cus i love jude law. he is just soooooooo handsome!! haha. and this is me and shereen aka ong lai. haha! gonna meet her again tml for another movie, confession of pain. my favourite tony leung and takeshi!!

on 28th, i went to meet my JC galfrens! havent seen maryanne in 3yrs i think. it had been such a long time since i had a gathering with the whole grp. i had met minyi and manyi separately but never as a whole grp with maryanne! so you can imagine my exhilaration when i saw the girls! we went for a KTV session and then late dinner. it was really great seeing the girls, and catcing up on old times and letting each other in on what is happening to us at the moment. we had even made it a point to meet each other monthly or once every two mths. it ll be great to catch up with them often! we wana go to settlers' cafe next! cus i havent been there before. haha. maybe we ll go during the 4th week of jan, since next sunday i am meeting elrica already, and the 3rd sunday of jan, we r gonna celebrate my brother's bday. so, i guess i ll organise one outing on 4th sunday of jan. yippee!! i love my jc galfrens alot. and i think its extremely impt to keep in contact with all your friends in order to keep the friendship going strong. if you do not try to do so and take ur friends for granted, one day, you ll find that they had slowly left you. its something i had experienced before a long time ago, but since, i had never taken my friends for granted anymore. =)
and thats manyi n minyi, maryanne and me!! i love the girls so much. and i cant wait to see u girls again!!

we knew that it ll be a long time before we met up again so we took many photos on our own using the self timer function. haha. which explains why the photos either have too little headroom or too much headroom. hah. i only gotta say i miss these girls so much and i really want to see them soon!! love you girls! =)

on 30th i went to meet the 2/4 girls!! i havent seen them in such a long while, esp girls like eileen and suli. all of them were there except suli! i miss you suli! but we had a fun time on the whole. we bought fake eyelashes and did the girly stuff like talk about bfs, (for me, its ex bf, haha) and had dinner then chilled out at TCC. i was really envious of the girls cus they were all happily in love. it made me feel like i wana fall in love again when i was with them. haha. meijing was really nice to me, she kept asking me to move on and find someone better cus she felt that wk dint deserve me at all. thanks gal! i appreciate your advice! too bad yufei had to go off immediately after dinner as she had to work. so the rest of us chilled out at TCC till late at night. before fei left, i took a photo with her! i couldnt miss the chance to take a photo with her cus i know that i wont see her anytime soon! it was so nostalgic just seeing th girls once more. all the way from sec one!! me and feifei!

before we left TCC, i took a photo with the rest of the girls as well. presenting to you the lovely babes from 2/4!!

yeah man, that was a whole week of meeting up with all my favourite girlfriends!! i really miss all of them alot and cant wait to see them soon! love you girls! =) more on NYE countdown at meiji's house in the next entry/ it was lots and lots of fun! haha.

lightning bolt told you a secret at 3:17 AM .

Happy New Year Everyone!!

Hey ppl, its a whole new year again! Time flies, doesnt it? I feel like i had barely done anything much and the year is gone. Recalling the year of 2006, i say that it had been a rather fulfiling year. It had also really been a very DRAMATIC one as well. haha. Thinking back, i feel that getting to know Carrie from Michigan is a highlight. She had let me in alot on her American culture and how different it is from Singapore's. The endless partying nights with her had been really fun too. I miss you, Carrie. Another highlight would be Samuel's superband competition. Going to support him at mediacorp every week and getting to know many other ppl from the competition had been a fun one. It was great experience knowing these ppl cus i know that they are very good contacts that i need for my reporting next time as well. hehe. and Diya got into Superstar and is currently doing extremely well in the competition. she is now in the top 3 of the girl's category. Everyone, we gotta give her lotsa support! jia you Diya! One more highlight would be that i got the best results of my uni life in year 2 sem 2. Have never seen so many As in my uni life before. That was a very huge encouragement to me. Somehow, all the fulfiling things seemed to happen in the first half of the yr while the dramatic things happen in the second half. haha.

for the dramatic parts, wow, a whole lot. my very dramatic break up with him had finally ended.We broke and patch so many times and last yr october, he decided to end it once n for all. it was heartbreaking and certainly not for the faint hearted, i.e. me. i am such a hopeless romantic at heart, and i felt so upset for the past few months. it was so hard to get by and i spend every single night, without fail, drowning in my pool of tears. my social life dwindled and all i can remember is waking up to tears, calling him and crying till he hung up on me, and then slping in my tear-drenched pillows. it was horrible. it is probably one of the most dramatic thing that had ever happened in my life considering that i had never taken any past relationships as seriously before. well, we are still friends now, and i am slowly embracing singlehood. :) so, i guess it is probably and hopefully, a blessing in disguise.

and then, the second dramatic thing would have to be internship. it was a whole lot of disappointment and competition and mounting tension. friends who were vying for the same company found it weird and awkward to speak to each other. everyone felt nervous waiting for the interview results to be out, and for me, it was so disappointing when i knew that i was rejected. but as i mentioned before, things happen for a reason and i am glad that i got into sph. but hell yeah, it was such a dramatic period for all of us.

then there was the conflict between me, hsu and sy. it was crazy, ridiculous and funny, on hindsight. things could have been different if we handled everything differently. dramatic, yes. do i regret it? no. for me, whatever's happened cannot be changed, so i am fine with the outcome. at least i dont need to pretend to be nice to her in sch if i see her now. i can just ignore her openly, which is good!! :)

and then there was the conflict with 3 ppl in sch. not exactly a direct conflict but something that snowballed till almost everyone in sch got to know it. well, that is like the most dramatic thing i had experienced in sch in 2006. it is so scary!! haha.

ok, seems like all the dramatic things really happened in the second half of the yr. but 2006, despite all its downs and dramas, had been fulfiling for me in terms of school n internship company. :) in terms of my love life, i guess i have to cope slowly. life goes on without him!! i had met up with many friends lately and i am gonna post some of our photos up in my next entry! have you all written down ur resolutions? i had! and i am going to fulfil them! love, jaws.

lightning bolt told you a secret at 2:24 AM .